Susan and Christmas (Susan Thinks My Kids are "sad" for wanting Christmas gifts)

*Disclaimer- Susan has been cut off for almost 4 years now. 1000% no contact. She is still actively stalking and harassing, but she is greeted with silence. We have been unsuccessful in receiving a restraining order or subsequent charges (such as harassment and stalking) because of my stepdad's role within law enforcement.

Susan and Christmas is a sore subject. When she was married to my dad, my aunt and dad spent $$$$ to make sure we had an awesome Christmas and got most, if not everything on our lists. And as we grew, my dad and aunt kept up that position. We made a list, we got the list and a few surprises.

 

This irked Susan to all end. She insisted they were trying to one up her, and make her look bad. She couldn't buy us anything, because THEY bought it all. One time, to shut her up, my dad gave her $500 a kid for christmas at her house. Let's just say the situation didn't improve.

 

Susan buying gifts is the weirdest thing. She buys things you've never heard of and certainly never voiced you might want. Like for Christmas when I was 16ish and had my own truck: eyelashes for my truck. What? Had i ever voiced that truck eyelashes were my thing? But it was always things like that. Random stuff that made you go huh?

 

As we grew into adults, Susan didn't get any better. The Christmas I was pregnant with my first, Susan made a long status and TAGGED ME IN IT that her and my stepdad weren't buying Christmas presents except for the kids who were still in school or college, and then the ones who had grandkids and of course the grandkids gifts. Out of SEVEN of us, guess who was the only one who didn't have kids, or wasn't in school any longer? yeah....

 

Now, to backtrack a little, Susan, who I moved out of her house at 14 and in with my dad because she's a narcissist, spent my entire childhood/teenage years complaining that my dad and aunt spoiled us, we got everything we wanted and that's not right, we shouldn't get new clothes, etc, we didn't need this, we didn't need that, we need to tell them no, etc. I'd stepped way back and only include her in my life once or twice every two or three months, but her sister recently died before this next scenario so we'd seen more of her that month with Halloween too, than we usually do. I had to restrict her on facebook, because she's now starting this with me again... Concerning my husband now-'you need to tell DH that you don't want that, you don't need that, you don't need anything new, you need to stop spending, if you have that much extra money send it this way, etc" and the same with DD- She's going to be a brat, you're spoiling her, you need to stop buying her clothes, she doesn't need anymore, she has too many toys". She's also mad that my aunt, who was way more of a mom than her from 14-till now, is with DD everyday, and gets her things, etc. SO what? Susan was the only one that was making a big deal out of any of it.

 

So, the first Christmas I was a mother, Susan posted the following on her book of faces. Which made me see red. I didn't comment, on it though.

 

 

"Christmas is coming {already}. What do you get kids under 7 that already have everything they want? That means girls and boys, they get everything they want all thru the year making it hard to get something the special on a special day. But kids are so spoiled along with some of the younger parents they want a gift in that hand. Sad"

 

Enter her hoard of flying monkeys telling her not the buy the spoiled brats a thing! Read them the CHRISTMAS STORY, blah blah blah. I started pulling away, hard. She wasn't going to put DD in the same bubble she'd put me, telling me I'm a spoiled brat that didn't deserve anything. She gave DD a $5 doggie shaped flash light with the tag still on it, DH a $1 pair of Dollar Tree work gloves (tag still on) and me a too small infinity scarf with a $3 tag and a windchime of elephants with a $5 tag on it (I hate windchimes and Susan is well aware of this, because she collects them and it triggers me from when I lived with her. Also, my entire house was done in owls. So, to be handed an elephant windchime is just letting me know she gives 0 shits about me, i should be more like her.) And you know what? I LOVE the dollar tree. I'm fine with ANYTHING, but the gifts she gave just showed that either she 1) didn't know anything about us or 2) didn't give a flying fuck. Probably both. (and as we opened these my brother, who was grown and in college in his 20's, opened a drone, a chrome cast thing, about $250 worth of art supplies, and a leather jacket.)

 

The next Christmas was the beginning of the cut off. I'd put her in a time out and asked for her to respect said time out both when I'd done it and when I told her 'heads up, I'm pregnant, but I still think we need a break.'... Instead of respecting that, my mom and grandmother pulled in behind me as I pulled into my aunts driveway and blocked me in on Christmas day and demanded I hand over my daughter then both cried big tears "she doesn't even know usssss!" which were promptly dried up when they began to discuss that baby #2 was a boy, I was my mom made over and of course baby #2 was a boy since it was due 2.5 years after DD1, and that's how it was with my brother after me. (DD2 is a girl).

 

I haven't physically seen my mother within 10 feet of me since that day. Every year around christmas she takes to the emails, and letters, and social media posts about how it's PATHETIC her daughter will spoil her kids and even have christmas cards done but won't even speak to her own mother. And usually it'll come up that I'm probably raising brats to be just like me.

 

I was actually sent a screenshot tonight of a rant from her about how it's not fair she can't have her grandkids for Christmas Eve and morning, so that's sort of what made me laugh and write this post. Sorta petty, but whatever. Susan sucks at Christmas so it bothers her that I enjoy the holiday, is the only thing I can figure.