Susan Wants Me Alone at All Times

*Disclaimer- Susan has been cut off for almost 4 years now. 1000% no contact. She is still actively stalking and harassing, but she is greeted with silence. We have been unsuccessful in receiving a restraining order.

 

As most know by now, Susan is my batshit mother. She has strong connections in the legal system within our county back home, and really, the entire state. With that being said, she practically gets away with murder because everybody respects her police officer husband.

 

When I approached preteen years, Susan made it her goal in life to isolate me, and make sure I was alone. She couldn't stand the fact that I didn't come to her for comfort, or as a friend, so her solution was to separate me from anyone who wasn't her.

 

For instance, as a preteen she'd pull me away from the "sleepovers" she blathers on and on about and demand I leave my friends and do a random chore, or go wash my hair IMMEDIATELY and then sit for an hour and a half to let her blow dry it (when I usually air dried).

 

Then of course, there was the "bogus house arrest" bullshit at 14, which pretty much guaranteed I spent a lot of time alone in my room, crying. Because if I wasn't going to be with her, she sure as shit wasn't going to let me enjoy life.

 

Another time, I broke up with my boyfriend at 17. I went to my aunt (her sister's) house and was with my cousin, who was a best friend of mine. My aunt messaged my mom to let her know I was there and upset and to ask for my dad's number because she wanted me to stay the night. My mother lost her shit. She told me to come to her house right now. Of course that's a big fat NO from me. Then she called my dad and screamed at him to tell him if I didn't go to her house I needed to get my fat ass home. Then she sent two of her police buddies to "escort me" home to make sure I went home, ALONE.

 

After I divorced my first husband I'd put her in a time out so her absolute favorite game was to go down to the sheriff's department, file a false charge (for instance, she said I stole my grandmother's checkbook), they'd come arrest me, I'd sit there for 48 hours (the longest they can hold without bail) and magically at 47 hours, the charge would be dropped. She also let it be known to the jailers (still friends of her husband's) that I wasn't to go to population, they ALWAYS put me in holding cells and everybody who came in after me went to population. It was some of the darkest times of my life, being alone with no communication, no way of knowing what was going on, nobody to even speak to except the jailers who'd bring foot around 3 times a day and tell me that I needed to get over my fit and let my sweet mama back in my life.

 

After I had my first child, I spent 3 days in the hospital. From 30 minutes after my operation she launched her tirade, she didn't want my husband staying with me. It was my first child, of course he's staying, it's HIS first child too. No, men don't do that. That's just weird. Your mom is supposed to stay with you. Nope. So then she started pestering nurses to get them to say NOBODY could stay with me, including my husband because if she couldn't, he shouldn't either. I deserved to figure this motherhood thing out by myself since I thought I was such a "high and mighty".

 

Nowadays, if you read her letters, you can see she is bewildered because she can't figure out how to isolate me. She tells me to start staying at home, stop running the roads, but it absolutely kills her that she has zero control to make me be alone. (And she has a hard time doing fake charges these days because of a new sheriff and I also moved far, far away). Even in her emails that she sends these days, she is sure to let me know that "nobody likes me", I "have no friends that aren't online", and "I'm all alone in life when my aunt and dad die."

 

 

I've never really figured out what her goal was by isolating me constantly. Maybe it was a thrill for her. Who knows?